🚨 BREAKING NEWS: Ishika's makeup routine declared longer than a Bollywood movie 🎬 | Sephora stock rises 400% — "It's the Ishika Effect" 📈 | Her foundation has more layers than the Earth's crust 🌍 | NASA confirms: her highlighter visible from space 🛸 | Ishika's blush budget exceeds GDP of small nations 💰 | ALERT: Mirror files restraining order against Ishika 🪞
The Legendary Ishika

🌟 The Official Ishika
Appreciation Society 🌟

Patron Saint of Makeup & Queen of "5 More Minutes"

⚠️ WARNING: This website contains dangerously high levels of roasting. Ishika, if you're reading this — we love you, but your makeup collection has its own zip code.

👇 Scroll for the tea ☕

Ishika By The Numbers

*All statistics are 100% scientifically accurate (source: trust me bro)*

⏰
3.5 hrs
Average "Getting Ready" Time
(She says it's 20 minutes)
💄
847
Lipstick shades owned
("They're ALL different!")
💸
₹∞
Monthly Sephora/Nykaa budget
(Classified information)
📸
73
Selfies taken per outing
(Only 1 makes it to Instagram)
🪞
12
Mirrors in her room
(She still uses her phone camera)
😤
∞
Times she's said "I'm almost ready"
(She was NOT almost ready)

Ishika Ke Naam Shayari 📝

💄🪞✨
Ishika ne makeup lagaya itna,
Aaina bola — "Behen, main thak gaya itna"
Foundation ki layers ginne baithe hum,
Geology ka exam clear ho gaya itna 😭
(Ishika put on so much makeup, the mirror said "sis I'm tired." We tried counting foundation layers and accidentally passed a geology exam)
🕐💅🏃‍♀️
Doston ne bola "5 minute mein aa ja",
Ishika boli "Haan bas lipstick laga ke aati hoon"
Hum ghar pahunche, shaadi hui, bachche bade hue,
Ishika abhi primer laga rahi hai bhai 😂
(Friends said "come in 5 minutes," Ishika said "just applying lipstick." We reached, got married, had kids... Ishika is still on primer)
🛍️💰😱
Nykaa ka sale aaya toh Ishika ne socha,
"Budget mein rahungi, bas ek hi lena hai"
Credit card statement aaya toh bank ne pucha —
"Madam, aap Ambani se related hain kya?" 💳🔥
(Nykaa sale came, Ishika said "I'll stay in budget." Bank saw the statement and asked "Ma'am, are you related to the Ambanis?")
🌧️😰💀
Baarish mein Ishika ka makeup jo behta hai,
Nadi ban jaati hai rang-birangi so jata hai
Log kehte hain "rainbow dikha!"
Bhai woh rainbow nahi, Ishika ka contour tha 🌈
(When Ishika's makeup runs in rain, it forms a colorful river. People say "look, a rainbow!" Bro that's not a rainbow, that's her contour)
💕🤡💄
Ishika se pyaar hai humko bahut saara,
Par uska makeup routine hai sabse bada naara
Subah shuru karti hai, shaam ko hoti hai tayyaar,
Tab tak toh Netflix pe khatam ho jaaye poora Squid Game yaar 📺
(We love Ishika so much, but her makeup routine is legendary. She starts in the morning, ready by evening — by then you could finish all of Squid Game on Netflix)

Interactive Roast Games 🎮

🕐 Guess Ishika's Makeup Routine Time

How long does Ishika ACTUALLY take to get ready? Slide to guess!

30 min

🧠 The Ultimate Ishika Makeup Quiz

Test your knowledge of Ishika's legendary beauty habits!

💅 How Many Layers Can You Apply?

Click the face to add layers of makeup. Try to beat Ishika's record (spoiler: you can't).

Layers: 0
😊
Tap the face to start applying!

Testimonials 🗣️

Real reviews from the objects in Ishika's life

I've seen things no mirror should ever see. The 6 AM wake-up calls, the 47-step routine, the panic when she can't find the right shade of nude. I need therapy.
🪞 The Bedroom Mirror
Witness to unspeakable horrors since 2018
She has 847 of us. EIGHT HUNDRED AND FORTY SEVEN. And she still says "I have nothing to wear on my lips." Ma'am, WE ARE RIGHT HERE.
💄 The Lipstick Collection
Filing a class-action lawsuit for neglect
Every morning I wake up thinking "maybe today she'll go easy." Every morning I am wrong. My bristles are PTSD-ridden. I dream of retirement in a clean drawer.
🖌️ The Foundation Brush
7 years of service, no vacation days
She said she'd only buy ONE thing during the sale. I got swiped 23 times in one hour. I don't even know who I am anymore. Am I a credit card or a gym membership?
💳 The Credit Card
Currently in ICU (Insufficient Credit Unit)
I was clean once. I had dreams. Now I'm covered in 14 shades of eyeshadow and what I think is setting spray but might be hairspray. Send help.
🧴 The Bathroom Counter
Former minimalist, now a Sephora outlet
Main toh bas ek phone hoon, par mujhe lagta hai main Ishika ka asli boyfriend hoon. She looks at me more than she looks at anyone else. Front camera, always.
📱 The Phone (Front Camera)
Exhausted from being held at arm's length 24/7

🚨 EMERGENCY MAKEUP HOTLINE 🚨

If Ishika is running late (she is), call:

1-800-ISHIKA-HURRY-UP

Average hold time: Same as her makeup routine (3.5 hours)

*This number is fake, just like Ishika's "I'm leaving in 2 minutes"*